Love never fails.
25 Apr 2011 Leave a Comment
Memories can be fleeting, a subtle reminder of how things used to be. Sometimes you can’t remember the details but you know that a certain time and place felt…nice.
That’s how I feel when I reminisce about my dad. It’s been seven months now and while I have more good days than bad, everytime my mind gets time to wander and stop stressing about daily deadlines I think about him. What he would say to me if he were still here, remembering I don’t get a typewritten index card of a message reminding me to stay healthy, stop stressing, and to keep on touch with my siblings every week anymore. Or a daily good night phone call. Or a request to edit his latest holiday letter to the editor.
Sometimes, I fear I’ll forget. His jokes, his sayings, his laugh and demeanor. That as time moves on my memories will get dimmer until all I remember is that I used to have a father once.
That, maybe my mind will start recalling only small fragments of him that I won’t ever be able to tell my children a full detailed story about their grandpa they never met.
Even writing this is painful. If I weren’t typing this on my phone in a train full of people waiting to get home, I would scream my lungs out right about now. It’s not fair.
